“Unfair racism, prejudice and social intolerance.
“Thousands upon thousands of people starving to death and living in poverty.
“The world is a miserable, horrible place…
“But not if you eat Happy Cakes!
“When you eat Happy Cakes the world becomes a magical candyland and you forget all the horrors of real life! Happy Cakes, Happy Cakes, Happy Cakes!”
“Alright boys,” The CEO of Happy Cakes Industries turned off the commercial. “We’ve been running this commercial for months and sales haven’t increased one bit. And I think I know why.”
An employee butted in. “Um…maybe it’s because it’s too depressing? Why not a cartoon character or something?”
“Rob, you’re fired. The reason sales haven’t increased is because the commercial isn’t depressing enough. We need something to make the consumers believe that the world is horrible so our products will be an escape from reality. And I think I have the answer.
“We need not a depressing commercial, but a depressing TV show.
“I have connections with famed cartoonist Sean MacFurthine, creator of the acclaimed show ‘Fat Dumb Family Man’. He has agreed to help us by creating the most depressing, melancholy TV show ever created.
“The show’s name? ‘American Sad’. It is about a CIA agent named Stan who is also a family man. He lives with his wife, Francine, his son, Steve and his daughter, Hayley along with a talking goldfish and an alien. And the show is nothing but miserable and depressing occurences in their family li Continue reading