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American Dad Ivan
Grozny School Siege
12:00PM Langley,
Virginia
Twenty
year old Hayley Smith walked around Ivan Grozny University waiting
for her friend Ray Adams to straighten his black mortarboard a top
his head. Once the hat was perched neatly a top his head he greeted
her with a firm handshake.
Today
was the universitys first graduation of the year. Last years
graduation was cancelled due to a malfunction with the central
cooling system and old auditorium. The graduates eventually received
their certificates of completion from a different university. Hayley
couldnt remember the name; her memory at times seemed to fail her.
She wasnt graduating however, Ray was. She was still a junior
trying to finish the final semester of her year after transferring
from her community college. Ray was a senior and had met her in
middle school in Lynchburg. Hed never imagine he would graduate
from Ivan Grozny University. It wasnt a difficult school to get
into but its curriculum was overly demanding.
Hayley
walked beside him as they marched across the courtyard. A medium size
statute of Ivan Grozny toward over their heads, Ray grumbled at the
statute. She smiled wearily. Today is sure going to be an eventful
dayShe thought suddenly turning to Ray halting him in his stride.
Ray Im going to miss you! She hugged him affectionately
stroking the back his head gingerly. He hugged her in return surprise
by her mournful mood. He nodded agreeing.
Im
going to miss you too. Ill miss youre left wing Marxist
attitude! They both shared a laugh before breaking the hug.
Get
going before the coordinators have a near heart attack! She patted
his head watching him leave the courtyard to jog over to the brand
new recently built auditorium where a massive crowd of black gowned
and mortarboard capped congregation of students had gathered. The
majority of the crowd was women less than half were men. Ray was
still intimidated by his old junior high fears of girls in large
crowds. All the women seemed to stare at him as if to say, look at
this oneLate as always! He quickly shuffled over to the men
huddled in their own circle with most of their backs turned to the
women. There was an invisible barrier between the two groups that
could not be broken by the coordinators who ordered everyone to stay
in their place and not move from in front of the auditorium. A
handful of parents watched smiling.
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Francine woke up extremely horny one morning, Stan had already left for work and the children had left for school. Roger and Klaus where also both out. Francine home alone craving an orgasm started to dildo her pussy. The dildo wasnt doing it for her she tried going faster and slower she even reached for her larger dildo and when that wasnt working she tried DP with the two dildos. Although Francine managed some minor orgasms she could quite get what she was looking for. She started reminiscing about her bondage experiment. Francine was on the end of her partying years she had met Stan and was going steady she had a dream of opening a kiosk at a mall. Money was tight so Stan refused to give her any to purchase a kiosk. Even though Francine didnt know what to sell at her kiosk she was determined to get one so she started to seek funding putting ads in newspapers and posting flyers around town one day she got a call from a man who said he wanted to put her in a movie and would give her the $500 needed to buy the kiosk plus an extra $300. Francine accepted the $800 for what she thought was a minor role in a movie. Francine was to meet with the director at the place they where going to shoot, a abandoned looking hideout just outside town. Francine arrived at the area very nervous, the place looked sketchy and there was nobody around, she saaw the adress of the place she was supposed to be so she inhaled and knocked on the door 30 seconds later an eye slot slid open and a deep voice said
“Name?”
“Uh, Francine Smith” She stammered
The eye-slot closed there was some locks opening and then the door swung open and the man said
“Right this way Francine”
The man lead Francine down a hallway with 2 Continue reading
“Hurricanes.
“Terrorism.
“Unfair racism, prejudice and social intolerance.
“Thousands upon thousands of people starving to death and living in poverty.
“The world is a miserable, horrible place…
“But not if you eat Happy Cakes!
“When you eat Happy Cakes the world becomes a magical candyland and you forget all the horrors of real life! Happy Cakes, Happy Cakes, Happy Cakes!”
“Alright boys,” The CEO of Happy Cakes Industries turned off the commercial. “We’ve been running this commercial for months and sales haven’t increased one bit. And I think I know why.”
An employee butted in. “Um…maybe it’s because it’s too depressing? Why not a cartoon character or something?”
“Rob, you’re fired. The reason sales haven’t increased is because the commercial isn’t depressing enough. We need something to make the consumers believe that the world is horrible so our products will be an escape from reality. And I think I have the answer.
“We need not a depressing commercial, but a depressing TV show.
“I have connections with famed cartoonist Sean MacFurthine, creator of the acclaimed show ‘Fat Dumb Family Man’. He has agreed to help us by creating the most depressing, melancholy TV show ever created.
“The show’s name? ‘American Sad’. It is about a CIA agent named Stan who is also a family man. He lives with his wife, Francine, his son, Steve and his daughter, Hayley along with a talking goldfish and an alien. And the show is nothing but miserable and depressing occurences in their family li Continue reading
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Now With 50% More Family Conflict
As Stan Smith once said, A man kills what a man loves, before it weakens him. Aliens arent exempt from that rule either, especially not those torn between two of them. Roger/Smith het. Significant spoilers for subplot of The Magnificent Steven.
First for some warnings: medium-to-strong language, hard drug references, a section of non-con, slight clich™ use, and not-quite-explicit sexual content with a dash of belly button fetishism and food play. Still, apart from the last two or three its really no more explicit than the show itself tends to get.
Now for the notes. Firstly, this is my first attempt at American Dad fic (cross-posted from an LJ community), so constructive criticism is welcomed, particularly regarding whether I get them IC or not. Secondly, this story encompasses about a week (a day per section) twice-to-three-times longer a time period than the episode spans. If you have a problem with this, just call it an AU; if you dont, just call it an AU anyhow. Or dont. Im not fussed, and the time continuity in the show is a little loose anyways, given that most episodes are self-contained.
Disclaimer: I wouldnt want to remove the American Dad franchise from such a prestigious guy; between you and me, MacFarlane is a bit of a bruiser.
***
Day 1
It shouldnt even be her: thats what gets Roger the most. Sure, the cashier at Booze Town Liquor might be a little uglier than he expected up so close, but how is he to know th Continue reading
